The Public Eye

I make it a point to play golf every 15 years. I just can't help myself; I like it that much. But as passionate as I obviously am about the game, I understand there are people who actually play golf once a week or more, which proves that golf is the only human endeavor in which striving to climb from terrible to just plain bad is considered worthwhile.

After all, many people play weekly, even though they never get much better at it, suggesting that there is great enjoyment in being bad at something all your life.

But any golfer will tell you that it isn't about how well you play, but the camaraderie on the course, the constant challenge to improve, the recreational value and, of course, the beer carts.

For some reason, however, this philosophy doesn't apply to any other recreational pursuit. If I were to say, "I'm not golfing this weekend because I going to sing opera badly with three other guys on Sunday," people would think there was something seriously wrong with me. Even if I were to follow up with, "Yeah, but we're going to make our handicap on the 'The Ride of the Valkyries' this time."

I mean, what's the difference? Maybe you don't get to wear a visor in opera, but you do get a nifty helmet with horns on it. Besides, the odds of me nailing a 320-yard drive (or hitting the ball at all, for that matter) are approximately the same as they are that I will hit the high C note in "The Merry Wives of Windsor."

If I were to take a mighty swing at the tee, top the ball, and cause it to bounce a strong two feet away (a regular occurrence) my partners would saying something like, "Snake butt shot: low and it stinks. Yuk, yuk, yuk." If I miss high C, my partners would say, "Snake butt note: low and it stinks. Yuk, yuk, yuk."

What's more, there is no rule in amateur opera that says you can't have a beer cart come around during the Aria di sorbetto so you can lube up for the next part.

So what if you would never be good enough at singing opera to go on tour. I seriously doubt any of my friends will be playing in the U.S. Open either, yet they play week after week aiming high at becoming not bad.

There is, however, one thing about opera that might scare away recreational opera singers: it's something called a "sitzprobe." They say it's German for a seated rehearsal, but it sounds suspiciously like it might be related to hitting those high notes°